To wade into muddy waters, I would like to give my two cents, from seeing what I have seen while being in the Southern states on multiple occasions, but more importantly from being an avid student of history.
So let's begin down this road: Abraham Lincoln decides he is going to take a stand against slavery after he found passages in the bible that opened his mind to the (now obvious to us) fact that all men were created equal. (This is a happy thought for me, because nowadays people try to use the bible to take away people's rights - but I digress.) The South, powered by the slave industry at this point, secedes from the Union, purely because they don't want to stop slavery and could care less about the country as long as they don't have to stop. There are multiple quotes from various generals, soldiers, and politicians stating this exact thing. History doesn't waver on that point.
So: Honest Abe says; (paraphrased) 'It doesn't work that way, we are still going to let them go - and we aren't letting you go.' The South proceeds to fight to stay seceded so they can treat slaves like farm tools, whores, and just about anything else they feel like.
Now at this point, I want to identify that I do understand the sentiment of wanting to identify with freedom from Government if they are wrong, the right to secede when need be, and doing what you think is right regardless of what those in power tell you. The fact is the Government was not wrong on either issue in this instance, history is pretty clear on that.
Now the closest thing we can liken the Confederate flat to in other countries is the Nazi flag, unfortunately. (Yes, yes, I went there - just hear me out.) They believed the Jews were a lesser people and they took over the government to make sure they could keep them that way. The main difference is, (besides better technology in the latter) we had more level headed people in this country to stop our own form of Nazism before it took over the world.
Well meaning people fought on the side of the south, but ultimately, if one is to look back at history, that is one of the most shameful and embarrassing moments in our nation's history, right up there with killing off Native Americans just because we wanted their land.
Whatever pride has come to be associated with the Confederate flag, it's not the original feeling or intent of the people who flew it. Just like the Nazi flag represents an idealism that today embarrasses and horrifies the country of Germany, the Confederate flag should instill some sort of shame, at least alongside the pride - if not instead of.
If there is something I haven't brought up in this debate I am certainly interested in hearing it. Not stuff like "3,000 black people fought for the south," because we all know that very few free black people lived in the south, so the chances that they fought of their own free will is highly unlikely.
Many people who I generally respect opinion-wise have taken a stance for the Confederate flag - against taking it down, against possible legislation being passed to ban it, and I have not heard a single good reason given, other than they don't like being forced to. I have heard that it stands for Pride and not Racism, although history does not reflect that. I genuinely have not heard a good argument on this, and being a Libertarian myself, I am often against government involvement, but this major push against any action violating the 'right to fly this flag' just seems illogical to me - seeing what it stood for at the time.
I acknowledge that I do not live in the South, nor am I African America, (Although I have lived in the South in the past, and also play the bass...soooo) I am sure there are parts of the cultures I am not familiar with, but I have however been in the south with multiple friends of mine who are black on multiple occasions and I have been shocked by the level of racism I have seen there directed towards them that you just don't see in the Northern states. Seeing what I have seen, I can't help but think that the feelings of African Americans do not seem to mean that much to a decent amount of Southerners - but prove me wrong - I always endeavor to have an open mind, as I hope you did while reading this post.